silver and black make me laugh

mcnabb to the raiders?  lol.  i dont have any particular gripes with mcnabb except that he throws the ball into the ground on short passes and slants....that and he is kind of weird in general.  not much personality and way too many excuses for losing big games.  esp that last AZ championship game when he blamed the defense after saying that he marched down the field to take the lead and then the team didnt hold onto it.  Yeah he marched down and took the lead.  only problem is kurt warner did too. in the end mcnabb had a shot from the 40 with a minute or so left but they failed.  such is his career.  so close but a hair away from greatness.

now a part of me is kind of amused at the thought of him playing for a crappy team.  i dont know why but it makes me laugh.  although for all of you who think i am a hater i would actually be happy if he wins a championship elsewhere.  unless its against the eagles.

ultimately he is the best qb ever in philly.  i dont lose sight of that.

unless of course they are balding.

is there some rule about politicians having bad hairstyles?  most of them are annoying chumps but do they really need hair to match?  Anyway comb-overs seems to be the most prevalent hairdo but i find that kind of strange.  I myself dont know more than like 3 people who do that.  so where do these people come from?  i say the next president...after obamas second term...have a at least a fauxhawk or a frohawk.

here is my all time greatest and most confusing pic of a politician (kucinich) and his...wife?  i'm sure you're all as perplexed as i am.  great hair tho.  he reminds me of marv albert.  dont get me started on marv...

QURAN MAJEED THE BEST BOOK OF THE UNIVERSE

yeah i brought that up on facebook too.  (btw i actually blog on ustadhammad.blogspot.com and it comes up on fb feed).  the group known as "QURAN MAJEED THE BEST BOOK OF THE UNIVERSE" cracks me up everytime i read it.  its a brilliantly named group.  of course, as saqub and others have commented it, sounds like a 5 yr old arguing.  who else says that something is the greatest anything in the universe?  i heard a similar line once before and it was in nacho libre.  his little skinny sidekick (stephen) is sick and tired of orphans getting in the way of his professional wrestling career that he blurts out, "i hate all the orphans in the whole world!"  probably the best line in the whole movie...maybe even in the universe.  but who actually says something like that?  im sure some of you have seen pics from pakistani news or coverage of some kind of protest in pakistan when people take to the streets with horrible slogans and signs in english.  i am certain the guy who authored some of those brilliant picket signs was also the mind behind the name of that group. i offer an example...

anyway i explored the facebook group and looked up some of the posts on it which are kind quirky too:

"i feel mind satisfaction for joining the group, thank him." that one was a personal fave.  i guess in general the group all bad it is not but english many bad i find.

blowing my nose is my favorite part of wudu...

i have a tale of laziness.   i know ive had other posts about my laziness but it just never seems to stop and it manifests itself in so many brilliant ways.  lately we've had a weird toilet problem at our house in one bathroom where the water runs itself randomly.  so basically there is water wastage.  we've tried to fix it several times but no luck.  i refuse to call a plumber for something so lame.  they usually fix it in two secs and then you are left feeling incompetent.  i refuse to feel incompetent.  even if i am.  anyway someone must have attempted to fix it a few days ago cuz there is no top on the tank.  in fact no tank or flush.  so instead of putting the flush back on and covering the tank i choose to flush the toilet by reaching my hand into the tank.  that's right, i reach into the tank and into the cold water to find an ice cold chain and lift the flush mechanism.  now for those of you who are even more incompetent than i am when it come to toilets, the tank is different than the bowl and the water in the tank is clean.  so its not like i am sticking my hand into a toilet bowl but still i was doing it for something like the 10th time and it hit me.  what the hell am i doing and why?  and then i remembered im lazy.

title-less post

one of the biggest problems i have with emily dickinson is that she left a zillion poems untitled.  what the hell is that?  spent all that time writing clever poems with meaningful metaphors to capture human emotions...and no title?  is it laziness?  couldnt comeup with anything worthy enough?  i would have loved to be her assistant in charge of titles.  pretty cool job.  she does the hard part and i do the glory part.  well its not just her. there are plenty of other poets out there who leave a title out.  but here is an example of a poem that lacked a title but i helped dickinson out.  i call it nosegays. what an awesome word.

I went to thank Her --
But She Slept --
Her Bed -- a funneled Stone --
With Nosegays at the Head and Foot --
That Travellers -- had thrown --

Who went to thank Her --
But She Slept --
'Twas Short -- to cross the Sea --
To look upon Her like -- alive --
But turning back -- 'twas slow --

pretty obvious i got that title dead on.

the crap that goes through my head after crap gets into it

one of my problems as an occasional blogger is that i find myself "writing" a post at any given time.  for example in the shower today i started "writing" about why I was showering again after work  here's how it went...

i came home today late from work as usual but had to take a shower.  badly.  there was crap on me.  well in my hair at least.  i was doing a filling and a chunk of the lady's old filling flung out of her mouth and into my hair.  worst part is that my hair which has not been cut in over six months is curly as heck so something like a small piece of a filling could get lost...ew...i know.  so anyway im showering and shampooing and then i realized that, damn, my shampoo is watery.  i guess water leaked in somehow?  annoying.  as i stared at my shampoo bottle it occurred to me that it might be considered really weird that i am using baby shampoo.  yeah, that's right its johnson and johnson no tears baby shampoo.  i wondered what people would think if they knew.  (i guess i'll find out soon enough)  maybe i should be embarassed?  the thing is i started using it because i just cant imagine how using other shampoos that have like 25 ingredients (mostly random chemicals) could be good for my head or my hair.  so then as i stood there amused at my choice of shampoo i decided to count the ingredients of "no tears."  10, i think.  not counting colors.  i knew it was very few ingredients but i needed a number for the integrity of my blog.  why the hell do other shampoos have so much crap in them anyway?!?  in my case, if i have a full head of hair that is thick and clean then why change anything?  nonetheless, part of me was still insecure so i went to my next thought...

maybe i should be using a manly shampoo and soap?  well i tried to be manly after a conversation with someone else who claimed to use nothing but a bar of soap.  for everything.  hair, head, and body.  i tried that "man" shower recently.  my skin was destroyed.  my hair was tangled.  it was hard to blink cuz my face got all dry.  so obviously a bar shower is a bad idea.  at the same time i dont wanna be a guy that uses poopoo stuff.  no need for extra moisturization.  my skin is already strong and healthy.  like leather.  (that doesnt sound like a good thing).  but still, i got no complaints about my skin.  its human.  however, i do love those old spice commercials about using man soap to smell like jet fighters and punches and not perfume and baby powder. (dont know how i can agree given my choice in shampoo)  but thats what i use myself...well either old spice or gillette body wash...for men.  so baby crap on my hair.  man stuff everywhere else.  (im excluding facial stuff since i never thought about it in the shower) 

okay so then it got me thinking about a patient who recently said i groomed myself very well.  what the hell did that even mean?  is she mocking me cuz she senses baby crap on me or appreciative of my use of body wash, with a poofy sponge?  oh yeah... i use one of those plastic puffy things.  but i swear i buy manly colors.  black or blue mostly.  how can i resist the lather?!?  so good and so effective.  why should women enjoy all the benefits of exfoliation?  i figure my use of man body wash negates the sponge factor.  at the very least i break even. 

all said and done my hair was clean. ( and now that ive admitted using baby shampoo and a loofa, my conscience is also clean)  good timing too cuz the water was starting to run a lil cool. 

the rank of friends

i always find it funny how i have a lot more friends on fb then i feel like i actually have in reality.  i guess thats part of fb's beauty that you can keep in touch with people you would otherwise lose all contact with.  especially me.  if i dont see you once a week for 4 weeks straight i'll probably lose touch with you.  anyway i have a separate observation now about fb.  it has to do with the chat.  i myself dont really care if someone starts a chat with me but i def have a rank of friend that i would pretty much never start a chat with.  it would be like calling someone you havent talked to by accident when your cell phone is in your pocket or something.  then there are those i would rather write on their wall instead of having a dedicated conversation with them... even when they are online at the same time.  hell id rather go back and forth wall to wall then to actually have a box exclusively devoted to a conversation.


anyway i might try to invent something tomorrow.  stay tuned.

ATE (amjad tesla edison)

before bed but bored browsing the internet, i decided its time i invent something.  so here is what i got.  a prayer rug for two.  its a two man jamaat rug that is perfect so that both the imam and the dude following him can have adequate space with perfect alignment.  i usually use one fat one at home and its just not right.  i wind up being 2/3 on and 1/3 off.  but this solves all that.  observe: